The Process

In order to drink Juice you have to acquire it. The easiest way is at your local hippie store. They sell a 20 oz. freshly made juice concoction for 5-8 dollars. If this is the only way you intend to get at the richness of juice you will encounter 2 large obstacles. The first is having the riches to afford 12 servings a day, or 240 oz. of juice, or about 80 bucks. The second is wanting it fresh, so you'd have to hang out there with the hippies all day. Panhandling in front of natural food stores can be lucrative, but not 80 bucks a day lucrative.

The other avenue of bringing some of that fresh delicious nectar into your mouth is to make some at home. My friend, let's call her Heather since that's her real name, purchased one for $40. Juicers can sell for up to $500 new, and they're hard to find used since people love them. The more expensive juicers do two things better. They tend to extract more Juice from your vegetables. I'm juicing about $30 of vegetables a day and a cost savings could be found if the pulp came out drier. It would also be cheaper if I could get some free apples, but I haven't really tried yet. The second thing expensive juicers can do (the high end ones) is not heat the Juice. Slow, augur style Juicers extract more through smashing the produce than shredding them with blades. Heather's Juicer is a centrifuge-blade type, it does a decent job of extraction, and cost $40 instead of $400.

Here is an example of an afternoon Juice mix. beets, lemons, lemon cucumbers, garlic, carrots, celery, swiss chard, and an orange that was getting old on the counter.  I don't bother washing my produce or cutting it up any smaller than what's required to fit in the Juicer.  Oranges, melons, lemons, and garlic also don't have to be peeled, which is awesome about the garlic.  You might want to wash your produce if it isn't organic, but those pesticides are likely inside and won't wash off anyway.  No one wants to eat strawberries if the mexicans weren't wiping their asses while picking them, but you're racist if you think that.  I'm not afraid of produce unless it comes wrapped in a plastic bag.

Lots of greens at once can clog the juicer.

Shove some carrots or cucumbers in after the greens to clear them out.

Garlic likes lemons. The lemon juice cleans the blades of the garlic smell and helps get all the garlic essense into your juice. Works with giner too.

Douse the juicer with a couple ounces of water while its still on. Cleans it right out.

Juice and blog about it.